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Original: 4/12/2006 11:25 AM
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Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Bye Bye Beautiful

 
Currently Listening
In Keeping Secrets of Silent Earth: 3
By Coheed & Cambria
"A Favor House Atlantic"
see related

So I have this big poignant thing I'm about to say and I have to find a way to say it...

I'm pretty sure my life has changed.  Actually, I know it has.  I'm suddenly very happy and satisfied with my life due to some recent events and realizations.  About 5 years ago I made promises to myself in order to "preserve my innocence"  ...it sounds so incredibly lame out loud, but I made those promises and I kept them.  I'm very proud of myself for that.  I'm 18 and that means a lot to me.  It means that I've passed a point in my life reserved for innocence and now I have that point in time to look back on and know that I had a childhood, and an adolescence that didn't get fucked up by growing up too fast.   I can tuck the last 18 years away and be at peace with myself, while at the same time moving on and starting over as an adult.  I can make decisions for myself without having to answer to anyone, and I'm the only person who's responsible for the consequences. 

I finally feel like I'm my own person, and that I can mess up and it's okay.  I can do the things I want to do regardless of what anyone else thinks.  I'm done being afraid and it's liberating, I'm not afraid of anything anymore... it's an amazing feeling.

I guess I'm a woman now, :P I just grew up a whole bunch.  Self-reflection is fun!

 Posted 4/12/2006 11:25 AM - 13 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments

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